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The Horrors That Hide by Julianna Rowe (coming Soon)
Showing posts with label My Most Expensive Douche was Blue eewwww. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My Most Expensive Douche was Blue eewwww. Show all posts

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Expensive Blue Douche from China..by Diane Ogden

Well sit down. I thought I had a bladder infection....not. I thought I might have yeast from meds...not...I thought, its a tumor or cancer, no cancer doesn't usually hurt, OK then something else horrible in my body....duh...what from? So I make the appointment.
Doc and I talk about this situation. Then she asks me if I have put anything in "my" v-j j lately. I told her I hadn't in eight years...she laughed and said, "I guess that is a definite no." She was then polite be rephrasing that question and asked if I used any special scents in "my" v-j-j lately? I said I used a vinegar and water douche as I thought I might have yeast from antibiotic.... Then I remembered......I said, "Wait, when I bought the throw away vinegar douche box I accidentally bought that awful BLUE off brand probably from China and made with road paint." I thought she would split a side laughing. I said, "I went ahead and used the blue one about a week ago, and that is about when all this started. Oh My God, I am my Mother....I used it because I paid for it!! Just like my Mother use to make us eat ALL the food because they paid for it, "It cost money," was the word.. "that is why I have been ten pounds overweight all my life. This is all my Mothers fault!" She was laughing bunches. I told her then I used the used bottle for the vinegar and water. She thinks the road paint from China might be the problem, too harsh, and I am to just leave it alone for a few days. I said, "Like it is alone anyway." So no pessary, and it burns, and hard to pee. So...I told her that "China Blue is now the most expensive douche I have ever had in my life. " I could have bought a new small leather sofa for what that appointment cost!
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