Part II: "Cinderella Syndrome" .........by Julianna Rowe

Hello My Name is Katerina and I have so much more to tell: Gangsters and Guns, The Hooker and Charlie Rich, The Dentist, Virginia, and the Mob. Here is where it begins

Part II:  Crestview:  “The Cinderella Syndrome”  

          Raised as a female in the '50's is self explanatory to some, but not to others. The majority of girls were raised to find a good husband and have babies. To be quiet, cook, and clean. Example: Lucy and Desi in "I Love Lucy!" (That was the 70’s, I was raised in the 50’s!)

         Tragedy for Katerina became familiar in those days  in the form of being a sexual party favor looking to fit in and be loved. (Not as in hooker by any means.) Crashing on occasion into a self-loathing victim.  The “Pretty Girl” Syndrome.  Searching for the glass slipper with a foot that didn’t fit any shoe, much less a glass slipper… anywhere.  Waiting for a break never looking in the proper direction, within.

          I didn’t know how.  I was taught I was trash.

          Everything was an outward leap, while in reality I was drowning in the rapids of life waiting for rescue. Only to be pulled further down river by self-serving men escaping death many times over. Those men were sharp as the Eagle who soared high above the river with sharp eyes that could see beneath the surface allowing it to dive to catch its unknowing prey.

          I would choose situations reflecting the unsuspecting game I was led into playing.  The victim.  Living in a continuing state of blindness to everything surrounding me, the people, the places, and events that deftly showed the chilling effects to come, all the time thinking I was getting when in reality I was in a city of garbage still searching for Crestview.  It wasn’t there, nor was it anywhere.  Have you ever searched for years for haunting spirit you couldn’t see? 

          Crestview in reality was a negative force.  I made it a “make believe” place like fantasy land like Disney World. It's all I had.