Pennies From Heaven? by Diane Ogden

Wherever they come from I save them, and nickels, and dimes, and quarters.  I have bags and vases and urns full.  Yesterday my Grand and her friend came to visit.  We decided to take all the bags, vases and urns to Wal Mart to their handy dandy coin into bills machine.  I did ponder whether China might not try to "fix" the machine so they could keep part of my three year coin collection.  But the bank was closed so I swallowed fear once again and headed the the infamous W a l M a r t from hell.  First we had to use the abandoned grocery cart from my parking garage.  No this isn't a trailer park and I am glad someone abandoned it because the darn thing comes in handy sometimes.  Like when I am transferring coins in bags vases and urns to China.  We get all the bags, vases, and urns into the back seat on the floor.  One tire is sitting low at this point.  We all climb in and truck to the gates of hell where the girls find a new non abandoned grocery cart and once again transfer the money from the floor of the back seat of the Buick to the cart.  And in we go.  The three of us just stood facing the huge green money monster machine with blank expressions of "Huh, what to we do now? We're all smarter than fifth graders!"  We read the instructions which doesn't offer what the small service fee will be.  This is where the smarter than a fifth grader comes in handy.  I stopped one of the foreign (nothing against foreign long as they can speak English and don't take my job!) return clerks and asked her what the "machine" from Sam Walton's greedy kids now charges to TAKE my change and give me bills.  It was when she said, "Whose Bill?" that is when I knew we were headed back to the car for sure.  And then she said we would be charged 10 cents on a dollar.  I said, "WHAT?"  Kind of sort of loudly. Then I said, " Bill says that's robbery!"  That is when we decided we should take our cart and run before they called security or the greeter.  Both scary. I would have been aobut $50 short had I paid the small service fee!  We get to the car and my Grand lifts the largest bag of coins up up and over the cart only to have it burst open at the seam of the heavy duty baggie and spread itself on Hells Gates assphalt parking area directly next to the Buick. We all three again just stook there starring at the mound of coins spread about.  I think we must have thought there might be a stampede headed in our direction because we all went into 0-60 instant overdrive.  I give the girls each a latex glove from the trunk and a whisk broom.  They got every penny, nickel, dime, and quarter with the exception of one penny stuck under the Buick tire, which I forgot to get it after I backed out!!  And if you can only imagine I forgot to take even one photo of this fiasco.  Even I am shocked at that.  I was looking for a photo online of spilled coins but couldn't find even one.  That is when I ran into the beautiful floors made from pennies. I even saw a shower floor made of nickels.  Isn't that illegal?  I am now re-thinking turning my pennies in.  I may turn my old oak table top into a glass covered collection of pennies or nickels. Or I may re-do my sofa table or my headboard, or my counter tops.  One never knows what I will do next when the creative bug hits.  I have been saving that money for a long time for a new pair of designer Bvlgari rimless frames for me face!  As of now the coins are still in the back seat on the floor waiting to go to the bank.  Not sure how I will get them inside unless there is a grocery cart somewhere on site.  Will let you know.  Until then.....Be Safe, Be Happy, Be Well, and hey, Be Rich!